Worked with Em today, it was grand. :D

Got to work with Em today, work was actually fun. :D

Lawrence Krauss mentioned me in a tweet. I about died.

Today I was at the busy office and I think I did a good job today! Back there tomorrow for Friday!

I sent in my first letter to the editor. I almost felt purposeful and effective.

I act like a hard ass but unless I'm pissed off or feel justified, I don't like making people upset. Tweeted a Christian on twitter and she tweaked out. Granted, she was being bombarded by a lot of atheists, and I'm sure not all were polite about it. She was a kid who felt under attack. Not really conducive for informative conversation. Oh well, maybe she learned something. I just don't like it when I see another culture's symbols being appropriated or used without understanding its meaning. Christians wouldn't like it if I tattooed a cross onto me, they'd see it as disrespectful.

Coincidentally I do have a cross tattooed on me but I was still a Christian at the time and I was clinging as hard as I could onto my faith. Plus, it's my body and my tattoos all have meaning to me. I still go back and forth on whether I want to keep it or not. I think I want to cover it up with something though. The more I get into atheism, the more my little rose-colored god glasses are shattered.

Pizza pizza pizza pizza. Can you believe my Dad's side of the family doesn't have a smidgen of Italian in us? Like, all we do is eat (Americanized) Italian food.

I think that pencil skirts with high heels are sexy.

I actually did a bit of work today and the day went fast. Had some AMAZING pizza. Like, this was the best pizza I've ever had. No exaggeration. We hired a new associate attorney. I have a general wish that I can be trained to be her secretary. That would be kind of cool. Really though I just want a functioning computer at my desk.

We went out to the bar afterwords and it wasn't as awkward as I thought it'd be. I like my job. I wish that I didn't have to drive an hour to get there because I enjoy that office in some aspects more than Greensburg.

Red lipstick is fierce. However, I need to learn how to better apply it.

I'm scared to look at my bank account.

Funny how making a meal, not just reheating something, but making it, makes you feel accomplished.

Working bum

I went to bed at 7pm yesterday and woke up for work at 8am. Bum.

I must be masochistic

Just ate Taco Bell for dinner. I will regret this.

Oh lawdy

Back to dad's. Took forever to get everything over here and unpacked and organized. Hence why I'm only getting on now.

As for work I need to take it more seriously. That sounds harsh. I guess I need to give things my all and stop being so scatter-brained. I'll get the hang of it. I'm determined to have something work for me.

Today was a good day ~ Ice T

First day at the Greensburg office. It was fun, which is weird to say about an office job. But as long as I'm happy, who cares if I fit the stereotype of a 9-5? Routine is good and I certainly don't feel trapped in a cubicle.

Post Breakup

I always prided myself on being a bit of a hard-ass. I didn't need a boyfriend. I didn't need anyone, I had myself and I would always be fine. Sure, I wanted a boyfriend, but there were no guys I liked that liked me back. Or any guys I liked at that matter.

That changed when I saw a blonde haired, blue eyed guy my senior year of college. His name was Shane and I felt an instant connection unlike anything I've ever felt before. We were together for 1 year and 2 months.

He was my first boyfriend. My first (real) kiss. My first sexual encounter. My first everything. He was my first love.

He broke up with me last Tuesday night. I cried myself to sleep and gave myself a migraine the next day. I texted him for the first time since then last night and again cried myself to sleep. My eyes were almost swollen shut for half of today.

He still cares for and loves me, as do I. It was an amicable breakup. It's killing me and it's killing him. But it's the right decision I think. We're in different places, literally, and figuratively. We're young and need to discover ourselves. I know I still see myself as a kid who is just playing pretend in this grown up world. I'm sure he feels similar.

It hurts but I wouldn't give up that year and two months for anything else in the world. I've learned so much about myself. I never could understand why girls would get so enraptured with their significant others that they seemed to lose touch of their sanity. I just didn't understand. Now I do. I'm not saying I'm losing my grip on reality. That's a bit sensationalistic.

There are phantom memories. We made out on this couch. We had sex on that bed. We bonded over going to Pirate games. He called me Pooh. I called him a hipster about his music tastes.

Time heals everything. That's exactly what we both need. And if we ever get back together, excellent! And if we don't, I will have the best memories ever of my first love. He'll always have a special place in my heart. But I'm doing my best to not linger on the past and wail "why?!" Instead I'm looking to the future and living in the present.

Let's see what tomorrow brings.